THE BEST DAYS OF YOUR LIFE ARE STILL BEHIND YOU!

Now while some people find turning fifty a milestone, David Samson views it more like a tombstone. And he'll prove it to you whether you're a Baby Boomer or not!

Do you spend more on Metamucil than your mortgage? Do you resent the memory losses, the moisturizers, the menus with microscopic lettering, the hair transplants, the receding gums, the crow's feet plus all the racks stacked with "Easy Fitting" Levis?

Well, Funny Guy does! And in a death-defying performance (so-to-speak) he blows the lid off Craftmatic beds, hip replacements, varicose veins, Male Pattern Baldness and of course inflamed hemorrhoidal tissue. Plus he confronts...

• Why you should never trust anyone under 30
  
• Golden oldie mood music for the terminally nostalgic
  
• The Male "Mid-life" vs. The Female "Mid-Wife" Crisis
  
• How to have fabulous sex after fifty (and other delusions!)
  
• Should biological clocks be turned back in the fall?
  
• And -- of course -- Club Medicare!
  
  

Got Drugs?

Club Medicare

Get the picture? Well, David Samson does and it's not pretty. Already he can envision that golden day in Miami Beach hunched over his Reebok Walker. Already he can feel the arthritis in places where you're not even supposed to get arthritis.

And already he's paying special attention to hearing aids, pacemakers, denture creams and late night commercials for "The Clapper." Just like other pathetic Baby Boomers, Funny Guy is obsessed with:

• Why life (insurance) begins at fifty
  

• Impersonal Trainers and Exercises in Futility
  

• The love beaded and braided vs. the tattooed and mutilated
  

• Drugs of the 60's (grass & LSD) vs. drugs of the 90's (Maalox & Tums)
  

• The Perfect Middle-Aged Drink -- A Pepto Colada
  

• And why sixty is now the new forty (Ha! Ha! Ha!)

Yes, Funny Guy has discovered that with age comes wisdom, not to mention prostate examinations. He delves into sex, lies, and the Social Security system. Plus why he not only has an inner child, but an inner grandchild too!

Enough already! Listen to the words of David Samson (which he can't even see without his reading glasses). And discover why the older you get, the better you were!